If You Want A Good Love: Love A Broken Person

     This year, I have seen an alarming number of social media posts and magazine articles, all of which were poised to convince the viewers/readers that good partners are found by investigating their childhoods and making sure they were properly loved as kids. Because, according to these authors, "Broken people break people" and "Loved people love people."
     I must say, that merely typing this, feels like two hands wringing my heart as they would wring a wet rag. The mere fact that someone can even put those sentences into being, is just sinful, really. What is sin? Saying batshit like this is sin. Telling the world that broken people need to be forsaken, or need to be avoided in the first place, is probably the most heartless lie you can attempt to convince the people on this planet. So what are you trying to do? You're trying to say that if people were broken in their childhoods (mere victims of unavoidable circumstance), they should not be loved today? If sin is a thing, this is what it is!
     Before this year fully comes to a close, I want to set the record straight! Broken people are going to love you with every drop of blood in their veins and with every bit of marrow in their bones. They are going to cling onto you, hold onto you, and make you their world. It's the broken people who do that! The unbroken people don't even know how to do that, because it does not even naturally occur to them as something needful to be done!
     Now, I am talking about the truly broken souls. I am not talking about the people who go around acting like they're broken on the inside, just so that they can add a dark and mysterious storyline to their character inside the novel about themselves they've written down in their heads so that they can get laid more often. I am not talking about these bored minds. No. And believe me when I say, there are a lot of those around! Men and women who were raised loved and pampered and babied and then they grow up and go out and they decide they want to have this mysterious and dark, difficult and rebellious image. It helps them have sex more often. In reality, they have no "devil credits" to add lustre to any of their claims! They are just not broken. No. They'll break your heart and blame it on their "badness", when in fact, they grew up treated like babies until they were 22. Don't believe this type of facade.
     What I'm talking about, are the people who experienced real pain and real loss at an early age. People who have been through things. They have that deeper look in the eyes, they will look you straight in the eyes, straight into your soul, and you'll feel naked. That's the depths dug out by real pain. Pain digs depths into a person that they can show you when they look into your eyes. Pain digs valleys. In valleys there are shadows, there are yearnings for togetherness, for love, for connection. Valleys will give you what mountaintops never can. But don't think that these people don't have mountaintops, because, there is no valley without mountaintops! They are the mountaintops with the valleys. They're not just the tops past the clouds. They go all the way down to the ground! With all of those shadows cast, including all of those aromas one would smell while walking through a valley in between mountains.
     Broken people are not just worth loving, but broken people are the ones who are going to love you in ways you only thought happened in the movies. They're going to love you like it's the only thing that matters in life. And it's going to be either that, or absolutely nothing at all! Don't think you can "friendzone" a broken person! Because LIFE is just too REAL to fake that kind of pretense! Either everything or nothing at all. Because valleys know depths, not shallows.
     If you find a person who was unloved as a child, broken into over and over again, don't you dare toss that person away as a lost cause. You could be missing out on the greatest experience of your life. And honestly, if you do choose to do that, you're the one who's not worth loving, you've saved them a waste of their time!


  1. I'm not sure how to address you: C., Joybell, or fully C. Joybell C.? Regardless, I just wanted to drop a quick note to say that I have just discovered you through reading quotes on change and following the one that resonated most with me to your website. And then I read this blog post and my mind was silenced and that is a gift that few of us receive, no matter how long and diligently we seek it. When my mind came back online, I tried to just carry on with my day (I don't usually comment on websites), but I felt compelled to let you know that you impacted me and therefore changed me and thank you.


  2. If 'Broken people can break loved people', why cant loved people heal broken people?


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