The Conversation of Dragons: A Book Review by Tayla Beaumont

It’s time to meet Tayla Beaumont, a law student from South Africa! I’m sure you will be happy to read what she has to say about her experience with my book, The Conversation of Dragons:

The Conversation of Dragons has proven to be even above and beyond what I had expected. When I first started reading this book, I was not in the greatest place in my personal life. From the first page I felt like this novel was reaching into my soul and questioning me in a way that brings a rawness out of you!

As a longtime fan of C. JoyBell C., there is something which I truly appreciate from her writings: clarity. Clarity is something which I have not had enough of lately. And for that reason I would recommend this to anyone seeking just that. For understanding can only bring about a better you and consequently a better relationship with those around you and the society we are in!

Since reading can be a very personal matter, I would suggest experiencing this novel for yourself. For my perceptions and understanding may not be your own, or be the most luminous aspect for yourself. However, some of the most basic principles and sentiments in our lives is dealt with in this book — and that can fail nobody. Learning to conquer regret, betrayal, hopelessness, slavery and enjoying everything human and good in this life. I have learnt to see with potential and lessons. The age-old debate of darkness vs. light still goes on and seeing the elements and multitudes that exist in and around us gives us sight of what is the Truth.

May The Conversation of Dragons be your lantern in the dark, your Dragon Sight, as it was mine!”

A bit about Tayla (in her own words):

“As a 19-year-old student, I am entering my second year in law at the University of Cape Town. I am passionate about women’s liberation in South Africa and learning about myself and others. Horses have always been dearest in my life as I grew up on a small farm in Northern Kwa-Zulu Natal, and I compete with my thoroughbred, Ollie. I am constantly learning, evolving and experiencing this life, which I am grateful for.”

Tayla is fierce and gentle. Be fierce and gentle like Tayla. 😊

The Conversation of Dragons is now available for purchase on Amazon and other online bookstores. If you would rather, you can always place an order at your local brick-and-mortar bookstore and they will ship in the book for you within a few weeks.

Equality vs. Equivalence: The Implementation of the Foundation for a New Mindset

I think that the reason why society fails in the pursuit of many good things, is because people are not aware of the difference between equality and equivalence. Equality means the type and the value are the same, while equivalence means that while the types are not the same, the value is the same.
So, for example, when it comes to women's issues, women want "equality" because they believe this will make life better for them. So, they want to have not only the same value as a man, but also the same nature as a man. To be "just the same as" a man. But women should look for equivalence, not equality. Equivalence would mean that though the nature and the capabilities of a woman are different from that of a man, the value of these attributes and of this nature is the same value as that of a man.
In economy, the poor want equality with the rich. And so all jobs must be seen as equal. But not all jobs are of the same nature nor are they all comparable to one another. People should look for equivalence. This is when all jobs are of different capacities and are of different natures, and may in fact determine different salaries, but, the value of all these different jobs in society ought to have the same value in the eyes of people. Rich and poor are of same value, although not of same nature.
Equivalence is realistic. Equivalence will put an end to strife. Equivalence acknowledges differences while stating that the disparate result of these differences is the same in value. Equivalence will put an end to blindness, to political correctness, to pretension.
EQUIVALENCE is the answer.
This planet, this world, is home to many a brilliant mind, but alas, brilliance of mind does not equate vision. People can be brilliant while not seeing things as they plainly are. How could this difference between equality and equivalence, along with its extreme relevance in our lives and its applications and implications, escape the sight of those possessing brilliant minds? And why would that even be important? It is very important, because, our governments and our societal systems are powered by concepts and mechanisms that are built on fundamental beliefs; whatever those fundamental beliefs are! And it is the fundamental belief in equality that has caused our societies to become circular in progress. By "circular in progress", I mean that you are going around and around in circles and there is in actuality no progress that is being reached or produced.
Equality is fake. And why? Simply because it is not real. When you as a white man look at your co-worker who is a black man, the fundamental belief in equality, which you have been taught, would entail that you look at your black co-worker and not see the colour of his skin. Literally not see it with your eyes. But of course you see it with your eyes. Because it is there. But since you have been told that what you see is wrong, you pretend not to see it and you pretend that you do not see colour, that you do not see height, that you do not see physical form, and etc. You live in pretense.
Now, if we were to take away the fundamental belief system you have been taught and replace it with a new mechanism of thought; that of equivalence, your understanding and your interaction with your black co-worker would go like this: "He has black skin, I have white skin, we are not the same; nevertheless, our value as human beings is the same."
And then to extend this new mechanism of thought using these same two people as an example, the white man would continue to say, "He is a black man, I am a white man, we do not appear to be the same and we do not hold the same positions in this company; nevertheless, his position in this company is of the same value to this company as mine, considering the fact that this company needs every employee working hand-in-hand to attain a significant and shared goal: the goal of making this corporation a succeed. He could be in my position right now and I could be in his. Our positions are interchangeable, relying only on our skills."
Now, let us expand this new mechanism of thought even further and let us take it home to the black man and the white man coming home from work to their respective wives and families. For the sake of staying congruent with this frame of thought, let's say both wives have chosen to stay at home with the kids, running and caring for their homes. Their husbands come home and embrace them: "This is my wife and I am her husband. I am a man and she is a woman. She takes good care of our children and of our home while I work to provide her and our family with everything they need and desire. She could go to work to, she could run her own company, work at her own enterprise, or do whatever else she wants to do; nevertheless, she has chosen to apply her skills as a mother and as a wife, to our children and to our home life. She is the glue that holds this family together, she is my wife and the mother of my children, her role and her set of skills as a woman is of the same value— if not of far greater value— that my role and my set of skills as a man." That is how a man with a mindset of equivalence would think, would feel.
These two examples are interchangeable, of course. The black man looking at his white co-worker would also think the same thing when utilizing a new mechanism of thought, as well as the woman embracing her husband as he returns home from work. All would apply this new mechanism of thought powered by the mindset of equivalence. And an important thing to keep in mind while reading this, is that, I am not suggesting that the white man has a higher position in the metaphorical company and I am also not suggesting that all women should choose to stay with their children and home. But at the mention of children and home, I will say this: why on Earth would the task of taking care of the future generations and glueing together the fundamental particle of society (the family) be seen as having less value, in the first place? There must have been some form of brainwashing going on in the past decades in order to turn the opinions of people against the home makers.
My mother is a CEO and has worked her whole life in the family's incorporate enterprise, ever since she reached puberty. She never chose to be a stay-at-home mother! So, as you can understand, I am not advocating a lifestyle merely because it is what I have known in my own life. On the contrary, I am advocating the production and the dissemination of a new mechanism of thought that ought to be founded upon the mindset of equivalence.
You are being pretentious. You are so afraid of being called a bigot, a racist, an ignorant fool, that you have become exactly what you are afraid of becoming. You have become blind! Why? Because you are taught in a system that is likened unto the system taught in the story The Emperor's New Robes. You are not supposed to see differences, so you pretend that you don't see them, meanwhile, what you really see continues to boil and fester just below the surface of your skin! If you want to live a genuine existence and if you want to improve upon the quality of society, you will adopt and adapt to, a mindset of equivalence.
I, in fact, believe that hate crimes of various natures are pent-up frustrations that are born as the result of frustration and guilt. People immediately feel guilty when they do see difference, then they become frustrated with themselves, and when they are both frustrated and guilty, they form the belief that they must need to fight something, someone, somewhere.
Even the crimes of religion come about as the brainchild of equality. Because you believe that only one God created all of mankind equally (and of course that one God is your own God and not the other person's God), you have taken it upon you as your duty to reform the rest of humankind into the acknowledgement of your one true God, and only with this acknowledgment will come the implementation of "equality".
Where does envy come from, by the way? Envy comes from the infantile desire for all to be equal. Why is that person happier in their relationship? Why is that woman more beautiful looking? Why is that man happier? Why does that child have better toys to play with? There is a constant comparison to all others and to all other things, that is built upon the foundation of the mindset of equality and this is what begins to eat away at the mind, from an early age. Children grow up with envy in their hearts, with a desire to "make things right"; but in the wrong way!
This is not to say that I do not acknowledge that there is a lack of equivalence in this world and that many of the injustices that we witness today have come about as a result of that. Of course not. I am of course aware of this and that is, in fact, exactly what I am saying! There is a lack of equivalence. There is not just a lack of equivalence, but there is total absence of it! People today pretend to see difference in nobody and in nothing, while they fail to see the same value in people and things of the same value. Does this go to say that all people and all things are of the same value to all other people and to all other things? Of course not. But some things are of the same value as other things of a different nature. Some things are equivalent to some other things. Some people are equivalent to some other people. There are groups/clusters of things and of people that are equivalent in value. Why is this so? Because value changes depending upon the relationship of the watcher to what/whom he or she is watching! The life of your child is of course more valuable to you than the life of your neighbor's child. Let us be real. And nature has made it so, in order to ensure the continuation of our species. If all children were of the same value to you as all other children, then why would you take the time and effort to take care of your own over anybody else's? If all mammals did not value their young above the young of the others, then all young would cease to exist, thus the continuation of all mammal species would cease, as well.
You bring to me people who claim they see equality in all things and that they embrace the child of another in all belief that the life of that child is equal to the life of their own child; and so, you have brought to me a blind person, who, not knowing how to care for his own child, professes to be able to care for all the children of the world! Show me first how you care for your own child and how you value the life of your own child above the lives of other children and I will be able to see an example of how to love my own offspring, of how to love my own family, of how to do the same as you do! Does this therefore mean that I do not and will not love other children? Do not be simple-minded. I treat other children as if they are my own, and the friends of my own son can attest to this fact, because it is truly a fact! And why am I able to love other children to such a degree? I am able to do this because I have first understood the value of my own child and how to love him, thus, love grows and love extends. As my love extends, I am able to see that while the other children are not of the same value in my own eyes, as my own child; nevertheless, they are valued by their parents in perhaps the same way that I value my own child. And in this, I have indeed found a point of equivalence!
Equivalence is the one that actually demands something of you. While equality begs you to pretend that you do not see differences, equivalence requires of you to look at the differences, to acknowledge those differences, and to accept those differences as being of the same value. The black man is not of the same value as you because his skin colour does not matter; on the contrary, the black man is of the same value as you inspite and despite the differences in the colours of your skintone! The poor person is not of the same value as you because money does not matter, no; on the contrary, the poor person is of the same value as you because the value of a person is not measured based upon the presence or the absence of money. It is not that money has no worth—no— we all know and are fully aware of the fact that money has worth. Stop pretending that it doesn't, because it does. Nevertheless, money cannot measure the value of a human being. A human being determines the value of itself, simply by being born! All are born equivalent to the other, until a person chooses to forgo that equivalence by taking the life or harming the life of another human being. In the case of the latter, their life is equivalent to the life they have taken or they have harmed and should not remain of the same value as the value of the living and the value of the unharmed.
And so as you can plainly see, even when dealing with crimes in society, we ought to function with the mindset of equivalence in order to exact true justice in our world, into our systems.
Dear blinded and confused children, please come home. Please open your eyes. Please change.

Finding Worlds


       We have inner worlds. Many of us do. Not all, but many. Some have souls very young, too young to have formed any worlds on the inside yet. But many of us do and these worlds vary in their form, in their terrain, in their flora and fauna.
       Fewer are those with worlds that run deeply. Everything is deep: the oceans, the lakes, even the ponds are deep! The trees are ancient, their roots run for miles! The temples within are archaic, some even abandoned and covered by the seas. Those with worlds like this one have roots that entangle with the roots of others; the tangles are ferocious and sudden! It hurts very much to discover that the roots of the other person do not actually run for miles, but instead only run for a meter or two, into the grounds of their inner worlds. And since it is very difficult to come across another with depths and age as this, it becomes a pattern to feel pain. What is this pain? This pain is the feeling of the roots recoiling and returning to the former position. For roots must return to their former position within, upon the discovery that the other one possesses trees so young and roots so short... too short to entangle with. Maybe long enough to entice, but the entangling falls short because the roots are shorter!
       Those whose inner worlds are new, young and without ancient trees, also meet well with others of their same kind. Their oceans are shallow, their seas are shallow, their temples are new... it is of no fault of their own, they are merely babies, they are very young! They are enticed by the depths of the ancient worlds and often would like to join them. But the waters are bottomless, so they drown. The mountains too high, so they fall down. The forests and the fields too thick for them, they get lost...
       The ancient ones long to be discovered, long to be known. The ancient ones desire to hold a hand and lead a person into the thick forests, into the lavender fields. The ancient ones yearn to find roots that can entangle with their own! Alas, this is a gargantuan task! For the old ones are few and far in between.
       You must find a person by looking for the inner world that you recognize, that you may entangle with, without the pain of having to recoil your roots. And those of you who have newborn souls, newborn worlds within— I know that the pull of the old ones is captivating and intense; nevertheless, you ought to not go where you cannot stay! For the inner worlds of the ancient souls are not places for you to take from as you wish, to grow in as you wish, to become as you wish and then later to just walk away. The fruits of the forefathers are not there for your taking. Everything you take, you must earn, you must pay for. Do not walk in and then walk out.
       You must find a person, by searching for the world that you recognize. Have you been there before? Have you shared this world before? Have you climbed those trees together in some world, in some time, in some place? Because this is what you are really looking for. That hole in your heart? That hole is where the other world fits into yours! Now, will you find it? Because you should.

For Every Parent, Everywhere


       Today I would like to write a little something about parenting. I think that all fathers and mothers strive to be the best parents that they can possibly be, and I can add something to that, today, by discussing a point which I find to be crucial.
       My son is now 16-years-old, and I find that it is during his teenage years that I have made the most "interventions" into his life. Now, this is nothing dramatic, by "interventions" I just mean that I notice something and then I step him aside to talk with him.
       The important point here is when, as a parent, we are watchful enough to indeed notice something. A character trait, a thought pattern, a habit—  paths that our child is taking which we foresee to be hazardous, or just plain unbeneficial. When I see my son on such paths, ones that I foresee to be hazardous to his mind or to his life in the future, I sit down and talk to him. Or, I take him for a long walk and we talk while we walk. I give him my vision. I show him what is waiting for him down that path if he will continue to walk on it. When he sees the future as I see the future, then he, by himself, is able to make the necessary choices to change the path that he is on and to begin taking a new one.
       What I am saying here, is that vision is a crucial tool that parents may utilize. I suppose this is not easy, since many adults themselves have no vision of their own futures. If you have no vision of your own, how can you give vision to your child? And this is why I wrote the book entitled Raising Nobility. The goal of Raising Nobility is to give vision to the parent so that the parent may give vision to the child.
       Vision is the most-needed spiritual tool that exists. They will tell you this and they will tell you that, but, I am telling you right now that it is the vision of the Eagle that we must cultivate. The vision of the Owl, the Eagle, the Raven. If there is a single spiritual path that you wish to dedicate time to developing, let this be the path of vision. As a parent, it is the most precious gift that you can utilize while raising your child. When you give vision to your child, your child is able to put into action the necessary changes that he/she must take, in order to correct his/her future. Giving tools to our children is more important than just telling our children what to do and trying to make them do it. They must try to make themselves do it. And the only way that they will try to make themselves do it, is when they see what is in store for them up along that road they are currently on.
       If I were to tell you that 50 meters down the road, an oak tree is going to fall down on your car and crush you (God forbid this happen to you), I know that you would do everything in your power to avoid that road, to turn and take another way, or to just stop in your tracks and wait for help to come. Anything at all to avoid the outcome. You would change your own direction; not me. I wouldn't be the one making you do it, I would simply be the one showing you what lies ahead!
       It is the same thing when we parent our children. The technique is to show them in such a way that you are actually showing the truth, not some fearful imagination, not a sort-of-a- threat and not something ridiculous; rather, THE TRUTH! If there is an oak tree about to fall on them along the path they are on, then this is what you must show them, in a way that they will see it for themselves.
       How does a parent do this? You do this by being immersed in vision, yourself. Being immersed in Truth, yourself. From your vantage point, your children will see what you see, as the Raven sends warning signs out to its family members, so will you be sending warning signs out to your children.
       I hope that this short writing today has encouraged you on a better path for yourself and for the ones that you love. Have a wonderful day ahead!

My Gay Friends

       I have plenty of gay guy friends. A few gay girl friends, more gay guy friends, but the bottom line is that I have gay friends. Gay people inspire me and today I would like to share with you exactly why and how they inspire me.
       It is not my wish to write a political post, so do not consider this to be political in nature. This is a post about people: about me, about my friends, and perhaps about you.
       Us straight people— we all know how difficult it is to find that one person to spend the rest of our lives with and to build a family with. That in itself is probably the most important and difficult task that any of us have to make in our lives. Sometimes (many times) it doesn't work the first time, so we try again... and sometimes again and again! It's hard. It's important, it's crucial, and it's hard.
       If it's hard for us straight people, imagine how hard it is for my gay friends! My gay friends live everyday, day by day, knowing and very aware of the possibility that they might never find a partner in life, never be able to create a family. We all live with that possibility, but, being gay makes that possibility just about 50% more possible. Despite this fact, they choose to live every day happy and trying to bring other people joy in their lives.
       Being gay is never a choice. Who on Earth would choose to be gay? Nobody wants to be gay. Who would choose a life so discriminated against, with challenges and obstacles double the challenges and obstacles that a straight person faces? If for anything at all, a person would choose to not be gay just to make life easier, because life is already hard enough as it is. You don't choose to be gay, just like a lot of us do not choose the circumstances that we are living in, in this life. Do you choose the color of your eyes? Your hair? Do you choose the color of your skin or the parents you were born to? Really, the only thing that we are born into which we CAN choose, is our religion! Aside from that, what else are we born into that we may choose or choose away?
       Love is a double-sided monster. One half of love is a beautiful creature, the other half of love is a horrific creature. Two creatures in one. When you are on the good side of love, it is the most beautiful thing that you can ever aspire for. But when you are on the bad side of love, it can destroy your life. And love has destroyed lives: many of them! And yet, this monster is the monster that we all long for in this life and that we all need during our journeys in this world. What does it profit a man if he wins the whole world but loses his own soul? What is a soul? A soul is not only you, but a soul is the one you love, too. Facing this monster as a straight person is difficult enough. But gay people face the bad side of love every day, and some are lucky enough to make friends with it! And even those lucky enough to make friends with it, face serious opposition from the people around them and not just from the people around them, but, from their governments and the people who ought to look out for them.
       This is why I am inspired by my gay friends. Because they are strong, because they are forgiving, because they hope against hope. And really, this is just something I wanted to share and to say. Have a wonderful day, wonderfuls!

The Conversation of Dragons: A Book Review by Uzma Khan

It is time to meet Uzma Khan, a CEO living in Pakistan. You will love what she has to say about her experience reading The Conversation of Dragons!

"As I consumed the words and the pages of this prodigious book, questions kept forming and niggling in the back of my head; will you bequeath your legacy as having dwelt the unchartered, unknown and innermost or will you live prosaically having numbly surrendered to the lazy comfort of the ordinary, the known? Will you have the courage to turn your eyes backwards and look deep inside, stare right into the void, the darkness within? Will you walk inside the mirror and hold on to the other you and say I understand?

It exposed me to a plethora of emotions. It led me to ruminate over not the usual 'purpose of being' but more importantly over 'being'. It pushed me around in discomfort like one feels when one lands in a lake not knowing what swimming is. And when you emerge alive it’s not just with the knowledge of how the body and mind must coordinate a response or a series of actions but also a knowledge of the properties of the lake and water and of breathing. Everything outer and inner locked together in the synergy of existence. It led me to think, introspect, contemplate and meditate. For it urges you to arrive somewhere. It compels to build up that courage and a knowledge so wide and deep. It gives you a treasure that can never be stolen. It gives you a creed.

For me the book is all about courage. You need that throughout your reading and throughout your life if indeed you wish to remain pure of heart. And it’s about discovery! I discovered the most curious paradox when I was left bedazzled by the brightness of darkness. I discovered the beauty and grace in regret, the uselessness of guilt, the futility of the lingering fears that I have amassed during my unguided journey, the destructibility of those character flaws and those scars of self-condemnation. It is about opening your heart and examining the darkness for there lies the possibility! It is about the Eternal Flame of Life.

Thank you C. Joybell C. for giving vision to my soul. You are a Mystic whom I revere from the pit of my darkness to the infinity of my ethereal light."

Get to know Uzma:

Uzma is the Chief Executive Officer of INJAZ, Pakistan chapter of Junior Achievement Worldwide. With almost 3 decades of experience in the banking sector, she has successfully led and inspired highly motivated and successful teams in top global banks like Chase, ANZ and Standard Chartered; across Pakistan, South Arica and Singapore. Her passion has always been people and her recent move from banking to social development was rooted in her desire to transform the lives of youth and creating positive change for the underserved segment of society. She is passionate about living a meaningful and a purposeful life and for spreading the same message to those who feel adrift. She believes in the power of conversations and stories and the effect they can have on our lives and the lives of all those we touch. She believes in a creed of goodness, beauty and purity of heart. She believes in “Raising Nobility” and hopes her beautiful daughter, Natalia, is a herald of all such virtues.

You may connect with Uzma on LinkedIn.

Uzma is luminous and loving. Be luminous and loving like Uzma. 😊

The Conversation of Dragons is now available for purchase on Amazon and other online bookstores. If you would rather, you can always place an order at your local brick-and-mortar bookstore and they will ship in the book for you within a few weeks.
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